Rain, Rain, Go Away

The rain needs to stop.  It hasn’t let up for the past 2 days. I don’t say any of this too loud. After all, if you complain about the rain in Georgia, what you may get back is…but…we need the rain. Rain is good for the plants and good for the animals that lap rainwater; and, don’t you remember the drought when we couldn’t water our plants ?

Dark, gloominess, the cloud hovers. So much for southern optimism. And while it’s not super cold, after awhile the deep darkness, sound of rain and wind,  branches scraping the window on their way down gets depressing.  My head cloud is not lifting. The cloud is dark. If it lifts, it just lifts higher into darkness. Work helps. So I cut.  I cut up t-shirts. Sharp razor, pressure, slice the fabric.  Productive stress relief.

Could be worse. I could still be in Chicago. Instead of rain, it would be snow.  Everything frozen. Me frozen in my driveway cause I can’t get the car defrosted.  Me freezing at the top of a sled hill, trying to be a good Mom.  Retreating to my now defrosted car with a mug of something hot. Me the next morning easing from the confines of the house into the brutality of the cold. I didn’t have a dog to walk. I just need to…go, get out.

Rain. The rain is beating on the roof as if it’s cold out and it wants to come in.

A tanning bed?  I’ve thought of it. Wait. I don’t need that. How do those even work?

Following that mental road trip, I self-diagnosed myself with  a bout of seasonal affective disorder.  Light therapy helps.  So off I went to Home Depot, looking for light. I already have a bright light, but maybe I really need 2 . I get another and take it home.

Let there be light. Click. Lights on. All of them. Each one has 6 squiggly bulbs. In the manufactured sunshine fairly quickly my mood improves.  The music gets a little happier. I think of the song “Happy”.  I think of swimming in the Mediterranean in July. It’s working. I now also feel the warmth from the ‘sunshine’ as if it’s summer. In my mind, it is; and, for now, that and my quilts are all that matter in my head.

When things look dark, look for light. It gets better. Really.